Saturday, April 25, 2009

Enough of your crap




First of all, I want to apologize for yesterday's race. Where there was too much ragging and all, I'm sorry that some participants could not take it / took it the wrong way. However, it was cool that you all were willing to give your cooperation.


Btw, have anyone heard of Susan Boyle?



Yeah..I know

Her voice is just so omg angelic, if you can't bear the looks she has, close your eyes and listen. It is just fantastic, only word to describe it, what's in her voice is just a soul, so pure, just wanting to sing.


I can't cope with it anymore. the more I try, the deeper the wound will be. this is probably a good thing, a fresh start to keep me focused. the more I keep my distance, the safer it would be and I'll slowly slip away from ... life. still unsure though, is it a good thing.

& this time, I swear I'm not breaking my promise to myself again.

Quoted from WinnieHilmanKwan




Look, enough of this okay? I'm tired of this already. Why are you reacting to this in a wrong way?

My phone went dead
My charger is not working
I couldn't reply your text


Those petty reasons isn't good enough for you to throw some fit at me you know. I'm sorry to be harsh but I don't like to be a punching bad to throw your frustration on every single time. You'd get mad at me for the smallest reasons, I don't know why I'm the selected one, when you have someone else to do that to too.

No one is deliberately trying to hurt you, why do you always assume that I'm trying to do that when I'm just drinking iced tea at home? Ridiculous right? My battery is flat and you assumed that I purposely ignore you. If I wanted to hurt you, which I won't, I would have done something else.

I'm just trying to be your friend. But this thing is starting to turn into a plague. You promised to change, I've already done my part, it's your turn. You don't just go and break that promise, after you pester me to change, which I've already done.

And about going to your house, it's not like a purposely canceled on you. The weather was hot and I wouldn't want to get sick right? Why don't you try walking under that heat, anyone would get sick just like that. Why not you try putting yourself in my shoes, before you ask me to do something. Although I'm very patient, but you shouldn't take advantage of that. You said that ' ME ' not coming to your house is a disaster, but why? I can come anytime isn't it. After all, we're best buddies right. I wouldn't mind spending some time. But then, the imaginations that plays around your head when I don't show up are just horrible, honestly.

I'm with someone else
I don't care about you
I don't this and that


If I didn't care about you, I wouldn't bother talking or asking how are you doing. People here are trying to care for you where else you're having that never ending thoughts of people trying to hurt you. Paranoia, is that what they called it? I don't know really, ever since that Sunday I was spotted with my friend, you completely changed.

Look, pointing out all these is just pointless I think. You'd just throw away a friendship just because of a flat battery. Is this a joke or something? If it is, then congratulations, you got me.

Bottom line, I'm really disappointed with how you act just following your emotions and deciding without considering the fact that you're thinking too much? Hurt? You.... hurt? If I did hurt you somehow, then I'm sorry, but I have no intention of hurting you on purpose. Please try to not think like that.

I'm sorry for being extremely harsh, but if I don't get let it out, I bet that new sandbag I'm buying will be replaced by a new one really quick. You want the truth, here's the truth, hidden at the bottom of my stomach. I feel very uneasy everyday realising that it's only a matter of time before someone's outburst will be thrown at me. And what's ironic is, they pick the smallest reasons to get mad at me. I just hope this ends quick, I know things won't end up as how I want it to be, but what can I do right?

3 comments:

kymz said...

Unfortunately there are people in this world who thinks that the whole world revolves around them. Caught up in their own narcissism.

If these friends cannot appreciate your 'lack' of unnecessary devotion to their lives; cannot understand that they are not absolutes, they're selfish and immature.

It's not worth reliving a vicious cycle if the other party is unwilling to compromise if you have.

So please do not get tangled up in these webs. You have better things to do and focus on.

andrewtai said...

kymz i totally agree with you. get on with life forget about her

little grapie =) said...

me third!!!! =D

im so proud that you finally let that heavy burden and frus out of your long-time-keep-quiet-heart =D

it's a risky thing tho bcoz you might face losing a friendship or even someone you care so dearly.. but well.. it's just for their best. whether they take it in or they wanna leave, it's their choice.. you've done your part and next.. its hers.

like they always say...

The TRUTH, hurts. (i learn it from Pn Yong =))

but dear.. give her time. girls are emotional at the starting.. they never realized things around them until when someone hit them hard on the head and when they really START to look back on wat they HAD DONE, wisely, by using their brains instead of their emotions and sense =)

cheers~!

~GraceKoh~